Tips For Controlling Your Anger

Teen dating violenceIf you have a tough time controlling your anger, you can take steps on your own to improve your anger management.  The suggestions listed below can help you get your anger under control:

— Practice deep breathing.  If you feel yourself getting angry, don’t let it build up until you have a violent outburst.  Try breathing deeply from your diaphragm in long, slow breaths, giving your heartbeat a chance to slow down.  Repeat a word such as “relax” or “calm” as you breathe.  Breathing deeply will ease your tension.

— Change your environment.  Get out of the situation if you need to.  The quickest way to uncouple yourself from a source of anger is to take a five-minute walk and get some fresh air.  The walk will help you calm down and the break can give you time to think about the cause of your anger.  Find someone to talk things over with – someone who can help you calm down and gain perspective.

— Count to ten.  Counting to ten is an anger management tip that has worked for centuries.  The Roman poet, Horace (65 – 8 BC), said, “When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, one hundred.”  Counting to ten (or one hundred) helps you step back from an anger-provoking situation, buys time for you to examine the problem, and then decide on an effective, rational way to express your anger.

— Do something physically exerting.  Physical activity can provide an outlet for stressful emotions.  Numerous worldwide studies have documented that exercise can dissipate stress energy and improve your mood.  If you’re about to erupt, go for a brisk walk or run, a swim, lift weights or shoot baskets.

— Ask yourself this question. Before you react in anger, ask yourself: “Will the object of my anger matter ten years from now?”  Chances are, by asking this question, you will see things from a calmer perspective.

— Let go of what is beyond your control.  You can change only yourself and your responses to others, not what others do to you.  Getting angry doesn’t fix the situation and often makes you feel worse.  If someone constantly arouses your anger, focus on the troublesome situation and brainstorm solutions.

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